People keep asking me why I am not following my passion to stop sexual violence. Good question. I never know how to answer, which is silly because I know the answer... I DON'T KNOW HOW TO STOP SEXUAL VIOLENCE. IF I DID I WOULD'VE ALREADY DONE IT.
So what am I doing? Am I just giving up? Did I decide it was too hard for me? Did I succumb to the practicality of having to survive instead of pursuing my dream?
No. My dream didn't go anywhere. The need didn't go anywhere (that's for sure). I just am not ready yet, and that's okay. Maybe the world isn't ready either.
I had a conversation about this with my teacher recently and realized I need to forgive myself for not being ready to fight this fight. She reminded me that Oscar Romero was in his FIFTIES when he started shaking things up in El Salvador. I am not in my fifties. I am 23. I literally turned 23 on Monday. I am not ready, but the time will come. She told me I need to ask the universe to show me the way whenever it's ready....
Here I am, world. I don't know what to do. I have a vision for a better world, but I don't know how to get us there. Take me. Take me and use me in the way that you need me. Let my body be a vessel of something much greater than I am, let me serve you in the way that you need me to. I don't know how, but I am willing to serve and to go wherever you need me. Just say the word.
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