dear friend,

Slow the heck down. Take some time to think, to care for and love yourself, to reflect, to grow, and to decide who it is that you really want to become. Don’t you dare lose yourself in the busyness of life—we’ve come too far.

Stop second-guessing yourself. Believe in your power, in your wisdom, in both your light and your darkness. Forgive everyone. Forgive yourself. Know with faith that the universe will call you forth when the time is right and only then will you know how to best serve the world, how to best meet the world, how to best love the world. This time is not wasted time, it is a time for growth, a time for chance, a time for opportunity, a time for loving and forgiving oneself.

Stop questioning who you would be if life had turned out differently. It didn’t. And you aren’t anyone else. You’re you. Find gratitude for the life and LOVE you have been given, for your tender heart, for your open spirit. Look at me. You will help light the world.

I love you,

mt

letter to myself. 9:30pm 4.25.11.

Your whole life you have been different, felt different, felt somehow simultaneously lonely and chlosterphobic in your surroundings. People always tell you that you will do great things, that you just might have the ability to change the world--even if only a little bit--and you give them an awkward giggle or a pitiful "thanks." For years, though, you have been afraid. Afraid of trying and failing, afraid of never being enough, afraid of your endless hope and your youthful naivete. It is time to let go of these fears. It's time to step out of your own way. It's time to take flight. It's time to soar. You are different, but you were made purposefully. Failure only exists in holding yourself back. Otherwise, you know your determination will pick you up and push you to try again and again... and again. It won't be easy, but your life never has been "easy"--whatever that means--and that hasn't stopped you from loving, from learning, from growing, from laughing, from singing, from dancing, from breathing, from LIVING. It's gonna be okay. In fact, it's gonna be better than okay; it's gonna be beautiful and full of joy that you can't even yet imagine. You might lose people whom you love along the way--people who might not yet understand your spirit--and it will hurt you. Badly. (But only because you love them that much, and let's be honest, you wouldn't have it any other way.) But guess what. You will heal. You always do. You are just a seed, and the tree you will become is calling you forth. It is begging for you to grow into it. Answer it. It's time to run full speed into the water, into the night, into that uncertain darkness you most fear. But, mary, do it with your eyes wide open, your arms outstretched, your lungs sucking in all the air they can possibly hold. Fill yourself with breath, the absolute essence of life, until you think you may burst. Take time to be breathe, to be good to yourself--'cause in the end, I'm all you've got.

Oh, and in case you're unsure, I love you with all my heart. With all my being, dear, I cherish you.

PS--this weekend, make time to get your nose pierced. You know how much you love a surge of liberation.

"the danger of a single story."

http://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story.html

Okay, so I know this is almost 20 minutes long, but it’s a glorious 20 minutes and therefore totally worth your time.

I decided to share it specifically because she says she heard that to be a successful writer, one must have had a rough childhood.

In some ways, I did have a rough childhood, but in a lot of ways I didn’t. I think this may or may not be a human experience—the oscillation between joy and pain and everything in between. Rocket science, I know. Some things are hard and some things are easy, imagine that. Anyway, in listening to this woman’s thoughts about “a single story,” I realized that I am allowed to experience and express both that pain and that joy. In fact, I value in myself the fact that I so intensely experience both these emotions, as well as a full gamut of other emotions. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that my story is one of vastly varying emotions, each transforming me in its own right.

Enjoy. Love, mt

you will never be merely pretty.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6wJl37N9C0

Enjoy.

Love, mt

“Follow then the shining ones, the wise, the awakened, the loving, for they know how to work and forbear.” - Siddharta

I See Your True Colors and That's Why I Love You

I noticed lately how hard it is to talk about all the things we take part in that may stand out. I thoroughly dislike when people ask me to tell them what makes me a leader. I DON’T NEED AN AWARD TO TELL ME THAT MY INVOLVEMENT IN THE COMMUNITY IS WORTH DOING, SO STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME SHOW MYSELF OFF LIKE I AM A PAGEANT CONTESTANT. I AM NOT A TODDLER AND I REFUSE TO WEAR A TIARA. GOT IT!

When we participate in activities, we don’t stop and think, “Gee will this make me look better to a company when I am applying for that internship in the Fall.” We just do them (while wearing Nike sneakers). I mean maybe some people do things based on what they will gain…I am not judging you if you are one of them. Don’t hate me.

I suppose my main life question is why do I need to talk about myself? Don’t my actions shine enough without words? Doesn’t my smile say enough?

But at the same time the question remains, “Why am I not comfortable speaking about myself?”

I don’t really have an answer. Maybe it is because I am the youngest child and I never got a word in, although I did get quite a few tears in. Maybe it is because I lack the words to describe how brightly my true colors shine. JK. Maybe it is because we all shine brightly and no one is better. I recognize the light in every individual. Holla at me, Quakerism. Get it. Or maybe it is because my actions aren’t about the praise I may receive from others. Why live your life based on what others will have to say?