My Bliss

I figured I ought to reveal a bit more about myself in the interest of showing a bit more of where I am writing from. I love many things but two major ones are farming and the Greek Pantheon. Two subjects with seemingly no connection, but over the past few years I have reached a stronger kinship with both. This story happened during a very low point in my life, I had just dropped out of college and felt completely out of control and useless. It was during this time I discovered what I want to do with my life.

I want to be a farmer. I love digging my hands into rich, healthy soil. This is something I would never have thought remotely desirable shortly before I found myself doing it. After I left school I had no idea what I was going to do with my life or more importantly what I wanted to do with it. I was offered a position on a farm and I took it thinking it was a good in-between job because I had landscaped for years and worked briefly on a farm during high school; so I figured it was something I could deal with while I sorted things out. It was here I fell in love with the earth in the most amazing way. I always considered myself an environmentalist but it wasn’t until this time I felt the closest to the classical understanding of Gaia, the ancient Greek word and divine being of earth. I hadn’t realized what beauty there was in the cycle of plants and animals. I guess I always knew it intellectually but I hadn’t actually felt it until then. My boss and mentor’s philosophy was that we were stewards of the land. He showed me the patterns and the natural cycles taking place and when we let them take place we would benefit most. This meant considering and taking care of everything; including the soil and surrounding forest, as well as our plants and animals.

I’m afraid I might have lost you, so I’ll paraphrase Michael Pollan, from his book The Botany of Desire, in which he talks about how one spring he was in his garden planting potatoes, watching the bees take advantage of the blossoming apple trees. It was then he realizes that he is just like those bees. The bees don’t know or care that they are pollinating the trees and flowers, they assume they are getting the best deal; after all they are in it for the nectar. Just as the bees are in this larger system so are we. It is naive for us to assume we are ever in control of the earth, we are merely contributors to this larger system we may never fully see or understand. When we grow food for ourselves in the most beneficial way, we are promoting the rest of this system. So, It is in our own interest to be stewards, we need to stop removing ourselves from our picture of earth and realize we are children of Gaia.

One July night a few other farm hands and I returned from a bonfire party and decided to spend the rest of the night in one of our fields. Staring at the sky, being held up by the ground I had a major encounter with the infinite. The only way I can describe it is as a “holy shit” moment. When you are so overcome you can only put forth those very limited and unflattering words, even in your head. Laying on the ground with fellow “land stewards”, surrounded by living things we helped raise, it was hard not to feel the miracle we were participating in. I had found my bliss.

-Three Feathers