When I have nothing to say, my lips are sealed

I don’t really know what defines my voice. Is it my sarcasm? My wit? My desire to speak like a British person?

Perhaps it isn’t my voice but my silence that makes me unique. You probably wouldn’t be able to guess this from reading my rants, but I am a quiet individual. I just don’t find mindless gobbets of chatter essential to my daily life. When I have nothing to say, my lips are sealed (I would like to personally acknowledge the Talking Heads for their eloquent passage… you truly understand my core values). I’m comfortable, and at home in silence – and I would like to thank the Society of Friends for shaping that aspect of my lovely personality.

Quakerism teaches you to mind the light and be moved by that light. Once you are moved to speak, you do so. Quakers value self reflection. As human beings we learn more about our voices when we reflect upon what we value, then when we tell the person sitting next to us on the train about every single thing we did that day.

My embrace of silence doesn’t mean I won’t tell you when I think you are being a complete idiot; it simply means I would rather experience an internal reflection in which I can formulate my own thoughts then engage in a meaningless conversation about the weather (obviously the sweat and look of disgust on my face show that I know it is hot out, I don’t need to have a twenty minute conversation in which the farmer’s almanac is referred to). Now, once I have reflected in silence and I can fully grasp my own beliefs, I feel moved to share my opinions with the people around me – it just takes some time.

So I may live in my head most of the time, it doesn’t mean that my voice isn’t as loud as yours. If anything it makes me a more interesting person because you never know what I am thinking. Take that! There is one downfall; my silence has created some minor issues with people I love – mainly because they believe I don’t like them since I don’t speak to them. But if I were to fill the silence with word vomit, I wouldn’t be true to my voice – or lack thereof.

My advice to you is to embrace the silence.

-PBC