One whiz, without.

Would you rather eat a Double Cheese Cheese steak from your local franchise (cough, cough—Quiznos)?

Or one whiz, without from Pat’s?

You are gonna go for the whiz, without (if you like onions then go with a whiz, with. Problem solved). You need that greasy mess to feel satisfied. Don’t put that real cheese on my steak, I only like the best…cheese whiz. The point is, you want something authentic; the warm toasty sub isn’t a substitute for a Philly Cheese steak. It’s not called Quiznos’ King of Steaks; it’s called Pat’s King of Steaks. Things are better when they are real (and if you are trying to tell me that cheese WHIZ is not real, then you have another thing coming).

The question is: how do I become one whiz, without? I don’t want to be a Double Cheese Cheese stake, even if it is toasty.

It’s hard to be authentic in a world controlled by franchises. If I can’t even define who I am, then how can I be authentic? I suppose the answer is that if you don’t feel comfortable in your gut (much like when you eat a Double Cheese Cheese steak) then the action is not authentic. If you have to pause before your first bite, knowing it will not be a pleasant experience, then it is not an authentic experience.

Authenticity comes with years and years of practice—you don’t just have the food network knocking on your door to interview you after one day of business. It takes time. All you can do right now is listen to your gut: get the whiz, not this so called “double cheese” (which even sounds fake).